Emotional

That's me.  Crazy emotional wreak over here.  I've been crying everyday as the boys inch closer to their one year birthday.  I can't believe how much has happened, and how quickly time went by.

I remember every moment so clearly from a year ago today.  The first time I held Aiden, what he smelled like, the sound of his breathing and the feel of his tiny body against my chest.

My heart still skips a few beats when I think of the first time I saw Kaleb, under the wires, the sounds of the beeping monitors and rise and fall of his chest.  I can never explain the way I felt when my doctor came into my room with good news...I could finally hold him.  I scarfed my grilled cheese sandwich and made my way to the nicu as quickly as I could move.  I sang to him and silently cried so hard I couldn't breath.  I was utterly filled with so much love at his touch.

I'm grateful I had such a kind and patient doctor, who continues to take his time with the boys and myself.  He is a wonderful man and at times I'm not sure I would have survived handing Aiden over to anyone else when he had his first sleep apnea episode.  We see Dr. Madson on Friday for health and wellness exams, afterwards I'll be sure to post stats.

So HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEET BOYS!

I love you deeply, forever and always!